A funeral is never a pleasant event.

A funeral is sometimes expected, sometimes a relief, and sometimes a time of unexpected grieving.

And you should go to them. Almost nobody truly wants to go to a funeral. At best, you view it as a sad event that you wish you weren’t supposed to be going to.

But this is your rule of thumb: if you have the slightest thought that you should go to a funeral, you should go. You think it won’t make a difference, but it will. Because if you are thinking about it, that means that the person meant something to you or you to them or both. But go. At the very least, make an appearance and express your condolences. Even better: plan to stay a while. Talk to the family, talk to the friends, and maybe be the shoulder someone needs to cry on. Just don’t think about it, and don’t make excuses. Just go.

The person who died obviously doesn’t need you there, but maybe somebody else does. And you probably need to be there. Just go.